There comes a time in life where people talk about reflection. A lot of people say it happens after bad choices or loss, which have made me reflect in the past. But I have heard some people talk about how life is different after you turn 30. The reflection factor isn't forced, it just happens. I feel as though I am there right now. And I kinda love it.
With some crappy crap happening to me in the past couple of years it is so nice to look at my life and feel the positives in it. Not just say, "Hey I am positive today!." But to actually FEEL the positiveness. I have to thank the people that are in my life right now for that. The ones that call and cheer me on, send me little notes and postcards to brighten my day, and the ones that hold the mirror of life in front of me and say "You are such a good person." And I actually believe them.
I know, I know, most of you may think I should already be saying that to myself and believing it. But I had been letting negativity creep up on me and making me a grouchy lady. Well, grouchy grandma is no more! I am feeling the love and strength from those around me. I am climbing the ladder into the clouds instead of grumbling in the mud!
The nice words of encouragement have really been paying off too. I mean, I still can't believe I made the LTYM auditions! My etsy store is finally up and I have been accomplishing a lot of projects that have been sitting on the back burner for a long time. Karma in full swing? I would say so!
So this post is just to give a big hug to everyone who has actually REALLY been there for me. By focusing my attention toward the positive things that they have been pointing out in me (that were always there but I wasn't giving myself credit for) has really given me the strength to make negativity just smoke in the wind.
I need to remind myself of my mantra (that just happens to be tattooed on my neck so I can always have it at the back of my mind):
Live how you want.
Love who you are.
Learn from your mistakes.
That is all we can ever do in the end.
<<Big hugs>>
Showing posts with label self love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self love. Show all posts
Monday, April 2, 2012
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
I Just Helped Myself
My life has been feeling a little bit lost lately. Yes, I have an awesome, loving husband and two kick-butt boys, but don't you ever feel like something is just...off? I have been distant from my blog because I have been feeling this way. I didn't realize that I had been feeling off until yesterday, which just happened to by my Mom's birthday.
I was actually thankful to have a blog. That may sound odd and I never thought I would think that, but I wasn't really able to let go and get out all the sadness until I re-read some previous posts. I did tell myself that my blog would also play a role as a journal. A way to get what is in my mind out and maybe help others, and I guess me also. The posts I re-read really put me back to reality. I read them and honestly didn't remember the things I had wrote. Me reading them basically helped myself.
Being sad on certain "anniversaries" is going to be something that will be constant in my life and it is something that I am going to have to deal with forever. Although, the way I deal with it is the key to it all.
My goal is to rethink my thinking. Quit being so...lost. Find a path. Stick to it. Enjoy the mundane. Stop expecting too much from others and just expect more for myself. Just have a good cry and let it all out and start fresh the next day! These may seem so simple. But isn't it the simple things that just seem so damn hard to do??
There has been a lot of disconnection in my life lately. There could be a lot of thoughts brewing in my head how to get back at people or thoughts that would be cutting myself down just to try to make myself a marter. But what and who does that help? Definitely not me. What I read in a previous post really resonated with me,
A simple quote, simply stated. Can it be simply followed? I guess we will see.
Life has it's ups and downs (that could possibly be something I have heard for as long as I can remember). How you deal with those ups and downs is key. I believe honesty, self-realization, and learning are all part of dealing with the ups and downs. The question is, can I push all the negative thoughts out and let what I have to do to stay positive and on the right track come first?
This, I guess you could say will be my new year, new me mind track. I will focus on staying on this so I do not get lost in the sadness that we sometimes call life.
I will always miss my Mom and I will always wish she were here. Her spirit really does live on in all of the people that knew her, loved her and appreciated her for who she was.
I hope to be a person that will be appreciated for who I am.
Isn't that what we all want anyways?
Love and Miss you Crazy Mary.
Want to also re-read the posts that brought me back to reality?
-Everything isn't always cupcakes and unicorns
-Birthdays from the grave
-How to lead a happy life
I was actually thankful to have a blog. That may sound odd and I never thought I would think that, but I wasn't really able to let go and get out all the sadness until I re-read some previous posts. I did tell myself that my blog would also play a role as a journal. A way to get what is in my mind out and maybe help others, and I guess me also. The posts I re-read really put me back to reality. I read them and honestly didn't remember the things I had wrote. Me reading them basically helped myself.
Being sad on certain "anniversaries" is going to be something that will be constant in my life and it is something that I am going to have to deal with forever. Although, the way I deal with it is the key to it all.
My goal is to rethink my thinking. Quit being so...lost. Find a path. Stick to it. Enjoy the mundane. Stop expecting too much from others and just expect more for myself. Just have a good cry and let it all out and start fresh the next day! These may seem so simple. But isn't it the simple things that just seem so damn hard to do??
There has been a lot of disconnection in my life lately. There could be a lot of thoughts brewing in my head how to get back at people or thoughts that would be cutting myself down just to try to make myself a marter. But what and who does that help? Definitely not me. What I read in a previous post really resonated with me,
"Outside circumstances should not define your life."
A simple quote, simply stated. Can it be simply followed? I guess we will see.
Life has it's ups and downs (that could possibly be something I have heard for as long as I can remember). How you deal with those ups and downs is key. I believe honesty, self-realization, and learning are all part of dealing with the ups and downs. The question is, can I push all the negative thoughts out and let what I have to do to stay positive and on the right track come first?
This, I guess you could say will be my new year, new me mind track. I will focus on staying on this so I do not get lost in the sadness that we sometimes call life.
I will always miss my Mom and I will always wish she were here. Her spirit really does live on in all of the people that knew her, loved her and appreciated her for who she was.
I hope to be a person that will be appreciated for who I am.
Isn't that what we all want anyways?
Love and Miss you Crazy Mary.
Want to also re-read the posts that brought me back to reality?
-Everything isn't always cupcakes and unicorns
-Birthdays from the grave
-How to lead a happy life
Monday, June 27, 2011
For My Girls
I used to get e-mails from Danielle LaPorte via her website WhiteHotTruth.com. I am not sure why they dissapeared from my inbox, but my best friend reminded me that I need to get back into checking her website daily! It is all about being real with yourself and realizing the things you need to do to live life to it's fullest in a real view way-and who doesn't need that!? This was the post that woke me back up and made me love my girlfriends even more than I do now!
i cut my bangs way too short before a job interview. you told me to wear a low cut blouse to distract from the nasty haircut. i got the job.
you're happy for me. always.
you remember. everything. you're the encyclopaedia of...me.
you made the appointment for me. you waited in the car. we drove home in silence.
you make sure my burritos come with an extra side of sour cream, and you order pizzas with mushrooms only on half.
you took me to the coast when i needed it most.***
when i thought the pain would kill me, you reminded me that i wouldn't die of a broken heart.
you told that bastard to fuck off so that i didn't have to.
you drove the moving van. in your first trimester. while barfing at truck stops. you never once complained.
you very gently suggested that maybe one pair of shoulder pads was sufficient.
you called in sick for me when really, I was partying on the band's bus headed for Buffalo.***
you didn't make me wear taffeta to your wedding.
you lent me $200 bucks that made all the difference between rent and groceries that month. you tucked it into my purse when i wasn't looking to save me the humiliation.
you held my hand when i got my tattoos, and my wisdom teeth out, and my first really expensive pair of shoes.
you babysat so that i could be with my mother when she was dying.***
you dared me and then said: if you don't trust you, trust me.***
my baby was two days old. you came over and scrubbed my kitchen floor, made a lemon loaf, and rocked the baby so that i could take a nap, but i didn't sleep. instead, you and i just stared at the baby on the bed, together.
you bring me trashy magazines and don't judge me for loving them.
you coax me out of my own brain. make me stop working and have fun. and you have no idea what I do for a living.***
you are how i know god is real. ***
you are my heart honey. my harbor. my metric of faith. my fresh water source. my soul sherpa.
girlfriend, i could not, would not do this without you.
not ever.
you, girlfriend. you.
an ode to girlfriends everywhere
girlfriend, i adore you. like, insanely, madly, infinitely, priceless diamond, cosmic shiny adore you. it's crazy how much i adore you.
you told me to dump the chump.i cut my bangs way too short before a job interview. you told me to wear a low cut blouse to distract from the nasty haircut. i got the job.
you're happy for me. always.
you remember. everything. you're the encyclopaedia of...me.
you made the appointment for me. you waited in the car. we drove home in silence.
you make sure my burritos come with an extra side of sour cream, and you order pizzas with mushrooms only on half.
you took me to the coast when i needed it most.***
when i thought the pain would kill me, you reminded me that i wouldn't die of a broken heart.
you told that bastard to fuck off so that i didn't have to.
you drove the moving van. in your first trimester. while barfing at truck stops. you never once complained.
you very gently suggested that maybe one pair of shoulder pads was sufficient.
you called in sick for me when really, I was partying on the band's bus headed for Buffalo.***
you didn't make me wear taffeta to your wedding.
you lent me $200 bucks that made all the difference between rent and groceries that month. you tucked it into my purse when i wasn't looking to save me the humiliation.
you held my hand when i got my tattoos, and my wisdom teeth out, and my first really expensive pair of shoes.
you babysat so that i could be with my mother when she was dying.***
you dared me and then said: if you don't trust you, trust me.***
my baby was two days old. you came over and scrubbed my kitchen floor, made a lemon loaf, and rocked the baby so that i could take a nap, but i didn't sleep. instead, you and i just stared at the baby on the bed, together.
you bring me trashy magazines and don't judge me for loving them.
you coax me out of my own brain. make me stop working and have fun. and you have no idea what I do for a living.***
you are how i know god is real. ***
you are my heart honey. my harbor. my metric of faith. my fresh water source. my soul sherpa.
girlfriend, i could not, would not do this without you.
not ever.
you, girlfriend. you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)